Visit to Austin

Asia and I am in Austin again for a visit. Putting her to bed tonight - an extra tired girl since we arrived pretty late last night and she woke up early this morning - we had the following conversation:

Asia: Why are we here in Texas?
Me: Auntie Es had vacation so we came to visit her and Gong-Gong.
A: What about Nai-Nai?
Me: Nai-Nai isn't alive anymore.
A: I miss her.
Me: Me too.
A: Why doesn't she float down in a parachute to visit?
Me: That would be nice.

Aren't little girls sweet? Sometimes I like these night-time chats.

Asia survives Daisy Camp

Asia had her first all day camp-out without me or John or Zach. I had to wake her up at 6:30 AM this morning and dropped her off at her friend Anna's house. Anna's mom kindly agreed to bring Asia to the camp along with her daughter and another friend. The camp was 40 minutes away. Check-in was at 8:30 AM and they had to have eaten breakfast first. Asia was ready to go this morning. When I woke her up, she practically jumped out of bed and started talking about camp. "Is Girl Scouts camp today? Now? I can't believe it's today!" I had to quiet her down a number of times since it was so early on a Saturday morning. It was with a little sigh that I watched her ride off without me to camp. Whatever happened to her was no longer in my control. And there wouldn't even be much cell phone reception at the camp. I'd have to wait til I picked her up late at night to find out how it went. Nerve-wracking.
Oh, and I can't forget to mention the packing list that we were given. It was like someone wracked their brain to think of everything and anything the girls would need in all kinds of weather and for a whole weekend. The Daisy troop was only going for the day. The list had 4 T-shirts, 2 sweaters, 4 pairs of socks, a pair of water-proof shoes, a pair of sneakers, 2 bandanas, toiletry kit including toothbrush/shampoo/soap, 2 pairs of jeans, 2 pairs of shorts, etc. Basically the list that the older girls would get minus some pairs of clothes. Oh yeah, a roll of toilet paper, a roll of paper towels, a bag of sticks for the fire, a bag of soap peelings, juice carton, flashlight, bug repellant, sun screen, towel, dish towel, face towel, a gallon of water. One of an earlier craft from a Daisy gathering was to decorate these big paint buckets. The girls then used that to carry all their stuff in for the camp. Anyway, I rebelled and didn't pack the gallon of water, then felt guilty and found a liter bottle of water in the pantry for ASia to bring. I also didn't pack sticks/wood for the fire since I figured they're in a camp in Pennsylvania! There's got to be wood around. And I didn't pack the paper towels because John accidentally bought two packages of toilet paper instead. Hopefully it wasn't a big deal. When I went to pick Asia up, I saw a table packed with rolls of toilet paper so they obviously had enough of that. The girls even had to bring their own washable bowls, cups, fork, spoon. Guess that's being conserving... not having to throw away paper plates and stuff.
I wasn't as worried about Asia though because I trusted the two troop leaders, Marianne and Bernie. I knew Asia would be comfortable with them. Asia said she did miss me at the camp, but she said she didn't cry. She also said that a bigger girl at camp was crying for her mom. The older girls were spending 2 nights at the camp. Poor Marianne is going to have a migraine tomorrow.
I picked Asia up around 9 PM tonight. She was sitting around the campfire finishing up a s'more. Yummm.... She looked tired but happy. She got to buy a little stuffed animal at the camp store too. And made a bird house out of the juice carton, and this special camp fire tinder out of egg cartons and water-proof matches with nail polish. Neat.

glasses

Asia really wants to wear glasses, just like her big brother. And of course, John and I all have glasses. Here's a few pictures of her modelling with glasses. Where did the eyeglasses come from? Build-a-bear. They belong to one of her stuffed animals.

Not Again

Well, Zach is doing it again. He woke up this morning gagging and then it took a few minutes before he actually woke up. His eyes were open but rolled to the right. He was sitting up, moving his arms normally, but not awake. John even picked him up from his bed and brought him to our room, and he still didn't wake up. I kept pinching him and scratching his back, talking in his ear. Eventually he did wake up. I asked him if he knew what happened and he shook his head. He said he didn't remember anything. Then he went back to sleep for maybe 20 minutes and then woke up with a headache. He has an appointment to see his pediatrician in an hour or so and John's going to insist on a neurologist. Poor kid has been spitting up mucus all morning. If this is the way he handles sinus colds or something, that's awful. But if it's just that, I'd be relieved. Better than something seriously wrong with his brain. Fingers crossed....

Asia's Birthday

Today is Asia's birthday. Yesterday, we had her party since today she has a Girl Scout's roller skating event to go to. Here's a rundown of the girls who came and their birthday presents. Asia loved them all and had a blast. All the girls got along great even though one of them didn't go to the same school (Tori who lives in Wexford - but she went to preschool at Hiland with Acacia, Meena, and Asia).

Joey S - Barbie and swimming pool
Lydia O- stuffed pony with doll
Meena L - Webkinz pony and clothes
Acacia U - Loopers potholder craft kit
Tori S - Make your own Flower vanity
Morgan N - Jewerly and scrapbook craft
Morgan K - Moonsand activity set
Shea S - ToysRUs gift card
Ricki M (babysitter and friend) - Barbie with dogs

Asia had all kinds of ideas for her birthday party. Maybe in October or so, she wanted to have her party at Build-A-Bear. She had 4 friends in mind. Then after Zach's birthday party in November, which was at our house, she wanted her party at our house and to have John plan all kinds of cool games like he did with Zach's party. Then we went to Chuck E Cheese in Texas, and Asia wanted her party there because you get a cool Olympic-looking medal. You get the idea. ChuckECheese, home, Build-a-bear, ChuckECheese,home. This went on for a few weeks, til the day before I sent out invitations. I told her she had to make up her mind because we were going to send out the invitations and if it's not at our house, I would have to make reservations. Luckily she chose home because we can do whatever games and crafts we want, while at ChuckECheese, you can only play their games. I like that idea, though more work for me.
So then Asia had all kinds of ideas on what crafts and games to play. She wanted to play hot potato but with this smiley face hackysack that Zach has. Of course, Zach said she couldn't use it for her party. She was determined that it had to be a small ball with a smiley face. Why? Because the theme of the birthday party was to be smiley faces. Another day, Asia was watching a Strawberry Shortcake DVD, and of course - "Mom, I want a Strawberry Shortcake birthday!" Her idea was to watch the DVD and one of the activities was to play the karoeke game that is included in the DVD. Well, I did get the invite out and promised a fun party and had all the guests dress in their favorite costumes. What were most girls dressed up as? Princesses, of course. I believe we had Ariel, Sleeping Beauty, and Cinderella all present. Snow White's outfit must not be glam enough for these girls. I don't think I ever see a Snow White.
On the day of the party, Zach went to play at his friend Ethan's house. The last thing he wanted to do is be around a bunch of little girls. Meena and Morgan K were the first to arrive. Asia would show them to the dining room table so that they can do a craft that she had planned - making necklaces with Fruit Loops and also making structures out of gumdrops, marshmallows, and toothpicks (thanks to Chelsea F for that idea). Little by little, all the girls trickled in and went straight to the dining room table to work on their crafts. They were so quiet!!! Maybe they're used to being quiet in school when working on crafts. It was hilarious how quiet and well-behaved they were. School trains them well.
Then we made party hats. Asia was determined to use these cardboard stars that I had labored over for her Christmas party and didn't get to use. I had spent nights cutting out cardboard stars that I had covered with recycled wrapping paper from past birthday parties. For the Christmas party, we were going to make wreaths with the cardboard stars and tinsel. Asia and I even made two wreaths to use for templates. So I had this box of cardboard stars that I didn't think would last til next Christmas. Asia and I decided to use them to glue on party hats. Ricki had experience with glue guns, so she got the fun job of gluing on the stars and tinsel to the hats. The girls would put stickers on the hats first and then pick their stars. While Ricki was gluing things to the hats, I had a little makeover area. The girls would pick their own nail polish color from the dazzling array I had. John got roped into doing the temporary tattoos and of course, most girls wanted them on their cheeks! And I had earring stickers for anyone who wanted them. Joey picked the color black for her nails! Hmmm...wonder if that has any indicator of her highschool years. Tori was the only one who wanted a nailcolor that matched her outfit. Again... a sign for future times?
We also played a game I bought that is like pin the tail on the donkey. Since Asia also likes My Little Pony, the game came with a big My Little Pony poster of rainbow dash and you have to put a little rainbow sticker near the pony's rainbow tattoo or whatever you would call it. The first girl to go was Morgan K and she got the rainbow right in the right spot. Well, the girls started to get a little wilder at this point. It was fun to watch. I would blindfold one girl, Asia would start to spin them around and then all the girls would help spin the poor girl and then they'd all start yelling "Stop! Stop! Stop!" and then let the blindfolded girl put the sticker on. At first some of the girls would almost put the sticker on another girl since she'd be surrounded. But eventually, the girls would just turn the one who was blindfolded straight at the poster. The first 5 girls or so all put their marks right on the rainbow spot. We didn't make a big deal of who won and luckily these girls didn't care.
I knew that Asia had a lot of games planned and I also figured the girls would want to do some free play, so I put the birthday party at 3 hours instead of the usual 2. The party started at 2 PM by about 3:30 we were done with all the games! We did pizza and cake and luckily, I had a bingo game that I bought for some birthday past. Sometimes I'm glad I hoard all this old stuff! So we played bingo. Then I used the bingo pictures for a game of pictionary (since the girls can't read yet). John took a couple of group photo's. And at the end of the party, we had happy girls running around the house. Nevertheless, I took a 3 hour nap after the party.

Are Bad Guys Real?

Every now and then, your kids just say something that, while it's so ordinary to an adult, is really profound coming from a child's mouth. Asia and I were talking about bad guys while we were in the car on our way to her Girl Scout's Daisy meeting. It was later at night and maybe because of the darkness, she started asking if bad guys were real. She said she started thinking about them after that one day in the store when she went to the boys' room to change. It took me a few minutes to recall this event, then I realized she was talking about a trip to Kohl's over a year ago when Asia and I had a little argument about trying on some leotards for dance. She wanted to try on one that was too small for her and more expensive then the one I wanted her to try on. So after I told her that she could not try it on and then I went to look through the clearance racks for more clothes for her, she disappeared. I figured she was upset and was sulking over by the toys or something. I walked around a bit and couldn't find her. That's when I started to panic. What seemed like an hour was probably only about 10 minutes, but 10 minutes missing is still frightening. Frightening at least for a paranoid mom. Eventually I found her coming out of the dressing room in the boys area! She decided she was going to try on that leotard all by herself. Earlier in the shopping trip, we had gone into the girls' dressing room to try on some clothes, so she knew that those rooms were used for that purpose. At least, she didn't strip down in the middle of the store to try the leotard on. So on one hand, I was proud of her independence. She had walked all the way to a dressing room area, took off her clothes and put on the leotard, then came back to me with almost all of her clothes in her arms and wearing the leotard. I say almost all of her clothes because she lost her socks at some point. We retraced her steps and checked the dressing room and they weren't there. But anyway, I scolded her that day telling her that she should not walk away like that without telling me because sometimes bad guys like to take little girls away from their mothers. I told her that would make me really sad if someone stole her from me. I guess that made a lasting impression on her because she cried on the way home from Kohl's because she didn't want a bad guy to take her away. And of course, she couldn't sleep that night either. Ugh. It's so hard to know to what degree to tell a child that bad things can happen.

Okay, back to the drive to Daisy's and the present. So my dear daughter asked me if bad guys were really real. I debated this in my head on how to present the subject. I didn't want to lie and say that there is no evil in this world, nor did I want her to be paranoid about every little thing. So I told her that there bad people out there but they usually are in bad areas, not where we live, and come out at night when most people are sleeping. Sure I could have told her that bad people can be anyone and anywhere, but then I'd have a poor little girl who would probably never leave her house or my side again. Anyway, so all this leads up to the clever statement Asia made. She said:

"So bad guys are nocturnal?"

How funny is that! I had to laugh.

"They come out when people are sleeping, Mom. So they're nocturnal."

My soon-to-be 6 year old said that!

Yes, Asia, bad guys are nocturnal. Let's keep it as simple as that.

Nate the Great

We went to a showing of Nate the Great, a musical playing at the Byham Theatre in downtown Pittsburgh. It's always fun to get in some culture and we're lucky to have easy access to downtown to go see shows like this. The last one we went to was the Backyardigans. Maybe even John and I could go see something without the kids! It's surprising that we don't go downtown more often. I think it's the paying for parking. I hate paying for parking! During special events, it's not that expensive, luckily. We almost got into a garage tonight for 5 dollars! The garage filled up with only 2 more cars in front of us. Oh well. There was another garage a block away. It's also exciting to walk down the street when it's filled with people. It doesn't matter that the majority of them were either families going to the Byham or Steeler fans going to tailgate parties before the game. I have been around Heinz Hall on a Saturday with no games going on, and it was pretty busy too. That's always a good sign. You always want a bustling downtown. Otherwise your city may be in trouble.
So back to Nate the Great. I think I may have read some of the series before, but since the title character is a boy, maybe I didn't get past the first book. ha! Anyways, I think now that Zach saw the musical, he may be interested in reading the books too. In this 50-minute musical, Nate has to help his friend Annie find a picture she painted of her dog for her mom's birthday. They eventually figure out that it's her little brother who painted over it. Annie always likes yellow, her brother likes red. There's a painting of an orange dog in Annie's brother's room. I asked Zach - what two colors make orange? Red and yellow!
The clever thing about the musical is most of the supporting actors played multiple roles and were the stage hands to move the scenery around. Two parts of the scenery were these triangular columns that could be rotated to show a different scene - doors fom the street, shelves from Annie's room, etc. Some of the actors played multiple roles. I think Annie's dog was also Annie's brother and her best friend's cat. Then one of Nate's imaginary detective friends was also Annie's best friend, etc. And another neat thing was when they would transition from scene to scene, they would incorporate the actor's into the transition. Like Annie and Nate would be talking while they're rolling a white picket fence out of the scene. Or one of the imaginary detectives was unlocking the wheels for a rolling bed and then would pretend that he forgot that the audience wasn't supposed to see him. I really liked the direction and production of this play. The kids really liked it too. When Annie was singing about what girls could do and said something about boys having short necks, Asia asked me if that was true.
It was just great to get out of the house and go see some more of downtown Pittsburgh.

email

There's a benefit to having your child know how to read, type, and do supervised email. :)

---

Date: Tue, 16 Dec 2008 14:20:23 -0500
From: zacharyneill
To: elise_neill
Subject: Hi


Hi mom you"re the best mom I"ll ever have.







I love you.

Daisies

Asia is now in Girl Scouts - the Daisies. I don't remember there being a Daisies group. Es was in Brownies. I was in Girl Scouts, but I only remember being in it for like one year. I didn't even ever buy the outfit - the whole green sash, dress, hat. I did get a bunch of the pins and badges. Anyway, this week was the Daisy Christmas party with a little gift exchange. Each girl brings a wrapped present, then the scout leader read a story and every time she said the word "Santa" the kids had to pass their gifts over to the next person in the circle. Then when the story was done, everyone had a different gift in their hands. Asia ended up getting a charm bracelet set. It was cute. She had a great time. A bunch of her friends are in the Daisy group so she really likes to go.

Holiday Concert

Asia had her Kindergarten concert this Friday night. She was so excited! I'm glad to see such energy in her. Instead of trepidation about a performance. She did well too. She actually looked bored towards the end. The kids sang like 13 or 15 songs! I don't know how they could have memorized them all or maybe they didn't. I'm sure there was a lot of mumbling here and there. I didn't even know all the songs.

So here's the more embarassing thing. When the kids got onto the stage in the beginning, Asia lifted up her skirt! She had been complaining a little bit about her underwear falling down and I tried to fix her skirt before the concert began but she was so excited about the concert that she didn't want to wait. She had to go with Mrs. Swegan to get her Santa hat! So anyway, as she was walking up the stage, she was pulling up her dress so that she could pull up her tights! She had no qualms about it. Of course, she wasn't showing anything since she had white tights on. And of course, there were chuckles in the audience. It had to be my daughter. Yes, no anxiety or stage-fright all right.

Dear Mom....

This is from the newspaper clipping in the Austin newspaper or the funeral website. I forget which.

Sha-Li Cheung of Austin, TX, formerly from Ohio and Taiwan, died on Sunday, May 4, 2008. She will be missed dearly by her family: her husband, David; children, Elise Neill (and husband John), Esther Cheung, Samuel Cheung; her grandchildren, Asia and Zachary; along with many other family members and friends. Her life was a life of expressing Christ to all who knew her – in her cooking, in her singing, in her caring.

Sha-Li enjoyed baking and decorating cakes in her kitchen while listening to hymns CDs. Her home was always open for friends to stop by for dinner or conversation. Her caring and generosity was a major part of her service in the Church in Austin. Services will be held at 1 pm on Saturday, May 10, 2008 at Wilke-Clay-Fish Funeral Home, 2620 South Congress, Austin, Texas. The burial will follow at Onion Creek Memorial Park.

This is from my mom's funeral, my little eulogy. I've been putting off adding this to my blog because it makes me sad, but I'd like to put it in now as a dedication to my mom. I miss her so much.

******

Dear Mom,

I miss you. I miss you telling my kids to eat their vegetables, and then making them a chocolate cake with strawberries. I miss you reminding my kids of the starving people in China. I miss your cooking. Thank you for leaving dumplings in my freezer and the peapods from your garden. I wish I could have spent more time with you, writing down your recipes. I figured I had all the time in the world. I always envied your garden. Why didn’t I inherit your green thumb? You would send me pictures of your vegetables growing, taking over the whole yard. I would plant the long beans and peapod seeds that you sent to me in the mail and then watch them bear perhaps two or three measly beans. I wondered whether it was that Texas weather or just your miracle touch.

I was going through your purse the other day and I got more of a glimpse of just who my Mother was - besides being the one who nurtured me, gave me character, and fed me. There were Mystery of Human Life gospel tracts. I could see you reading those with ones seeking something more in life. There was a well-used address book. Sam, Esther, and I were in there quite a few times from all of our moving around. There were pieces of paper with brothers’ and sisters’ names on it, receipts of some sort. You were active, Mom. To the day you died, you were so involved in the church life, in family life, and you even left some time for yourself – to learn to decorate cakes and grow a garden.
You weren’t supposed to leave yet. Not for at least another 20 years. But Mom, you lived your life to the fullest. I’ll miss you.

And then I added a PS that I spoke in the eulogy. It really was something I added in the morning of the funeral. I had typed out my eulogy the night before.

P.S. I thought that if something like this would ever happen, I would be so angry at the Lord. Forsake Him or something. Instead, I feel the Lord's arms around me, holding me firmly and whispering, "Do you still love Me?" I have to answer, with no hesitation, "Yes, Lord, I still love You. I want my mom bad, but Lord, I do love you."

zach snack

So ask me what I did with my evening? In honor of Zach's birthday tomorrow and a short day of school due to the Thanksgiving holiday, I made buckeyes - chocolate-covered peanut-butter balls - for Zach to bring to school to share with his second-grade class. Yes, I know. I pity the kid who's allergic to both chocolate and nuts. Get that kid a celery stick. And yes, I also know that I'm loading up these kids with sugar. But I figure, it's a short day! The parents get their kids for the rest of the day. The teachers won't have to deal with the sugar-high and then the subsequent sugar crash. Hey, I'm just not one of those mom's who brings healthy snacks to school. The healthiest I might get would be Harvest Cheddar Sun Chips or maybe those ones that say something about multi-grain. You won't see me supplying carrot sticks and ants on a log cream-cheese laden celery sticks. I know what kids want - sugar and peanut butter!

Another Big Scare

I think my kids like to give me a big jolt every now and then. See if I'm still alive. So the other day, around 7 in the morning, I heard this sounds like one of the kids coughed, puked, burped. Something. So I peeked my head out of the bedroom door and didn't see anyone up or moving about. If someone threw up, they'd be up and calling for one of us. So I went back to bed. Then maybe 20 minutes later, I heard it again - this time I can tell someone is throwing up or something. I check on Asia and she's sound asleep. I go in Zach's room and he's lying there, mouth open, and drool or puke or something coming out of his mouth. So I tell him to sit up while I get a towel and I tell John that Zach is throwing up. John put a trashcan on the bed and Zach threw up again. It was just mucus. But the weird thing is Zach had his head turned to the side, like he was embarassed about throwing up and didn't want us to see. So he kept spitting up (wasn't that much) but on his shirt or the blanket and not in the trashcan in front of him. I tried to tell him to spit in the trashcan, nudging him. But he kept his head turned to the side. I realized he wasn't hearing us, so I pulled him to me and his eyes were staring to the extreme right so I could barely see his pupils. And his head was stuck turned to the side. I kept talking to him asking him if he heard us, pinching him, gently shaking him. Eventually he came to, like out of a deep sleep. He didn't know what was going on and just wanted to go back to sleep. We let him, but kept checking on him to make sure he was okay. He woke up 1/2 an hour later with a headache. And then threw up some more. The next hour or so was me in a panic, going on the internet to see if Zach had a seizure. Calling my sister to see if she was still at home. Checking the pediatrician's hours and agonizing that they weren't going to be open for another hour. I ended up calling a different branch and they said we should bring Zach to the ER. I had read that too, but I really didn't want to bring Zach to the ER. The good thing about the ER is all the tests readily available, but the bad thing is the cost and the waiting and the waiting. I didn't want to put Zach through that.
Anyway, I ended up waiting and making an appointment with my usual pediatrician. John brought Zach in (poor kid was still throwing up every 20 minutes or so but no substance) and the doctor said Zach had a mild cold. A MILD cold!!! All that for a cold? Just too much mucus in Zach's tummy was causing him to vomit. But the seizure? The doctor couldn't explain that and said it was rare. We're just to see if it happens again. Ugh... I hope it doesn't. Stuff like this sticks with me forever.

Vacationing in the Dominican Republic

John, the kids and I went on a great vacation this past week. Five nights in a beach resort in Punta Cana, Dominican Republic. All-included resort. We got the deluxe suite with a jacuzzi bath tub and shower, patio, drinks stocked daily in the mini fridge, fresh fruit plate each day. Pool in the front of our villa, beach right at the side, and right next to the kid's club. Here's a view of the villa we stayed in.

The room was pretty nice. We couldn't control the A/C though and it was always set at 21 degrees Celcius which was just too cold. Especially when you're running into your room from outside in the evening and you're wet from the pool. We almost always had the A/C off and just the patio doors open for a nice breeze.

The first night we were there, Asia got sick. I think it was from the milk I gave her to drink in the lobby. They had snacks and she wanted some milk. There was a carafe of milk next to the coffee, so I gave her some of that. I gave some to Zach too but he didn't drink much because he said it was warm. He doesn't like warm milk. It dawned on me later that this milk carafe must have been sitting there all day unrefrigerated. Poor Asia. She was nauseous at dinner and didn't want to eat. She ended up falling asleep on my lap. Then when we got to the room, she ran to the bathroom, but nothing happened. She woke me up in the middle of the night saying she didn't feel too well. So I put a trashcan near her bed and a towel. She woke up a few minutes later and puked all over the floor - near the trashcan. But pretty much on the floor and on my feet when I ran over to her. We used up most of the towels in the room. In the morning, I put them all in the balcony and then showed them personally to the cleaning lady so she'd know to take them out. Asia was still a little queazy during the day but by the evening, she was her old self again.

Here's a picture of Zach on the boogie board. The kids had a blast with it and then we left it in the hotel lobby when we got on the shuttle to go to the airport. Oh well.

One of the things we did at the resort was horseback riding. It came with the package. A 2 hour ride. I've never been horseback riding. None of the kids have, besides riding a pony on a fair. But those ponies are usually led by a trainer or tied to some kind of ring or something. This was like - here, get on a horse, and there you go! I swear the guide for our horse ride was swearing under his breath in Spanish and saying stuff about the Devil, like "what the devil?" John was thinking that more likely one of the horses was named Diablo - like the horse John had. It was so tall - perfect for John. But also a little headstrong. At one point when we stopped and were getting off of our horses, John's horse kicked out after John got off. The horse kicked my horse some (more my foot) and then almost kicked John! The horse that Asia and I rode liked to torture us by riding along the edge of the trail so that we ran into trees or were whipped by the bushes. I kept trying to steer the horse back to the middle and it would jerk his head. I think maybe these horses were just tired of being ridden all day? I tried to show it who was boss, but the last thing I wanted was for the horse to buck off me and Asia. And what do I know about horses? Just whatever I read about training dogs. Wonder if you can use the Dog Whisperer's tactics on horses? Here's a picture of me on the horse right after John's horse kicked my foot.

Zach got to ride on his own horse.

car mess

I was driving the kids somewhere the other day and while sitting at a traffic light, started thinking about the mess the car was in. Trash everywhere. Zach's sports equipment covering the floor. There was a tennis racquet, a light saber, numchucks, some soccer socks. Old juice boxes, sports drink bottles and granola bar wrappers. Books and papers full of drawings. Hockey pants. A water bottle. If someone were to analyze the family that drove this car, not only were they slobs, but I guess in a good way, they were obviously active - witness all the sports stuff - used too. And I guess you could say the family was creative - the papers full of drawings. And then maybe that the family had young kids who liked to read - the books. I read an article this past year about a woman who was doing an analysis on the contents of people's cars. She hadn't revealed her hypothesis yet, but if she did many multiple kid family's cars, I'm sure she found about the same thing - active chaos.
So then after analyzing our mess, I thought why is it that if you see a dad get out of a messy car, you feel for him. You think, what a great dad, taking care of the kids. And you ignore the mess in the car because it's almost expected. Now picture a mom getting out of this messy car with kids in tow, and if you are a mom, you might feel sorry for her or feel kinship with the mom. Now instead, you see a woman coming out with no kids in sight. You see the mess of the car, and you wonder what her problem is. Why is this woman such a slob! You know what I mean? A guy could get out of a messy car (with kids or not) and you don't think much of it. A girl gets out of a messy car and you think she has problems. What is it in our female brains that makes mess stand out so much? And riddle you with guilt? Even if you invite someone to your house, if the house is a mess, it's reflected on who? The mom or the wife. She can't take care of her household. She's on a sinking ship and obviously can't captain.

sleepwalking

I have something new to add to my motherhood paranoia. Yes, that paranoia that many mothers have of the worst things possible happening to their children even when there's a one in gazillion chance of it ever happening. Sleepwalking. Not my sleepwalking. Asia sleepwalking! I've heard her and Zach talk in their sleep before, that's not new. We all do that. But last night, John and I were watching a movie and I heard something outside my bedroom door. John paused the movie and I opened the door to see Asia kneeling on the floor. She had both hands twisting something imaginary and she was muttering something. I heard that you're not supposed to interrupt sleepwalkers, so I just picked her up and led her back to bed. She eventually woke up and told me she was thirsty. It spooked Zach too because he had heard something and got out of bed. I told him to go back to bed, but he came back to Asia's room a few times to see if she was okay. I wonder what she was dreaming about though. It was like she was turning two faucet knobs or something. Anyway, now I'm wondering, do I need a gate in front of the stairs? Would she fall down them? Would she walk somewhere else and hit her head? Ahhh! You get the paranoia now. So tonight, I put a bunch of stuffed animals around her legs. Hoping that they would deter her from moving too much. Or maybe they'll make a sound when they fall off the bed and she'll wake up. Good strategy, right? Stay tuned.

Back to School

Well the kids have been in school now for almost two weeks. They both love it so far. Zach has a new teacher - her first time teaching second grade. She's taught K and 3rd grade. Student-taught 1st and 5th. She's engaged. And yes, she's young! I think Zach will like her. She seems the type that all the young boys will like. She's pretty, dresses well and hip, and again, she's young and even single right now. She told us a story tonight at the parent/teacher opening night about how last year, her boyfriend sent flowers to the school before they were engaged. All the kids, especially the boys, wanted to know all about this person who sent the flowers, especially if it was a boy friend. Anyway, just the fact that she said she doesn't like to keep the kids at the desks in their seats, sounds like Zach will have a good time.

Asia too is enjoying Kindergarten. She's so ready for it. And she has so many friends in that grade that she sees in class or at lunch and recess. She has Zach's K teacher, too, so we know she's in good hands.

Here's a pic from the first day of school.

Cactii

Okay, what possessed me to let my 5 and 7 year old pick out and bring home their very own cactus to take care of? Their cute fuzziness made of prickles? Their interesting shapes that your dirty mind shouldn't be thinking of? Their greenness? Well, here's the story. Asia and I were at Home Depot. Yes, the construction supermarket of the gods where no stereotypical woman would go since it's so hard to find anything if you're unfamiliar with the layout and the terms. Unless you're just looking for paint. Or something for the garden. Signs like Paint and Garden are pretty helpful and straightforward. So Asia and I were outside in the garden area. John and Zach were over in the manly sections... looking for some gadgets to fix our darn fence gate that I can't stand. Back to the garden area. So Asia and I were looking around to see what foliage or flowers were still available to purchase during the end of the season. What color could I still put in those empty pots littering my front porch? I found some pretty mums, I think. Which are the same as carnations? Maybe not because then they'd be called carnations. Anyway, some pretty budding flowers. I chose two yellow ones and Asia chose a purple one. She was sitting in the cart with the flowers, which is unwise - something I found out when I took the crushed flowers home. Anyway, there wasn't much to buy besides shrubs and vines and trees, so as we were making our way to the checkout inside, lo and behold, we ran into a display of cactii and succulents. Doesn't those names sound enticing enough? Cactii and Succulents. Get them here. Way to go Home Depot marketing. The cashier even said that it seemed like a lot of people were buying cactus today. So there's this display of all these cute plants. Very few had prickles on them. And under 5 dollars each! So I told Asia she could pick one. I chose two. They looked so harmless. Then I called John and told him to meet us at the display so that Zach could pick one. While we were waiting, we looked at the other side of the display, and there were even prettier plants to choose from. Asia changed her mind and wanted this cute one that had this big pink blob on top. Again, no prickles that I could see. Then she looked at the top of the display and there were these long cactus plants each with a bring pink flower shooting out of the top. Asia changed her mind again and said she definitely wanted one of those. Well, of course, that had to be one of the prickliest of the bunch. Just a long tube of fine green prickles. Little feather looking ones. They didn't even look very sharp. We even touched them and it didn't hurt. By that time, Zach and John had joined us. Zach proceeded to find the scariest looking cactus of them all. Huge big prickles in threes all over the thing. But they were so big, I figured you couldn't miss them and therefore wouldn't touch them.
Anyway, we made it through checkout without any issue. Asia and Zach wanted to carry their cactus plants to the car and on the way home. We stopped by a grocery store so I could grab some milk, bread, and whatnot and when I came back, there was a little crying girl in the car. John, Zach, and Asia stayed in the car while I shopped - makes me shop faster. Very slick. Anyway, I found out that somehow, the plastic sleeve on Asia's plant had fallen off and also the plastic pot. So Asia was holding the catcus by the dirt roots. I opened the door and found the pot and the sleeve and put the cactus back in there. I asked her why she was still crying. Turns out she had prickles everywhere. Perhaps the cactus plant fell and she decided to catch them with her legs! Luckily she wasn't wearing shorts, but the prickles went through her pants anyway. The most painful was the one in her thumb. She wouldn't let us touch it. But she pointed out the prickles in her legs. About around her ankles like she had clamped her ankles together to catch or hold the cactus. All these little green pins on one side of her left and right ankle. I was going to try pulling them out but she insisted that no one should touch the prickles, but her. So she proceeded to start pulling them out, all the time crying. I called her Dr. Cactus. She was performing a medical feat on her own. On her self. She actually did manage to pull out most of those green prickles. John took out the rest later when we got home. He's the king of removing splinters, so removing prickles fell into his category.
So what possessed me to let them get those prickly plants and even replant them into nice pots and display them in my office and dining room? That darn Home Depot marketing.

What kind of Mom am I?

Last night, Asia asked me, "Have you played dolls before?"
I'm wondering what she's leading up to, so I answer, "Yes."
Asia adds, "But have you played dolls with me before?"
Does the girl have a bad memory? Or do I? I'm wracking my brain trying to remember the last time the two of us actually played dolls. Sure, I've bought her dolls. Told her to play with her dolls. It's after her bath time and she's playing in her room while I get her brother ready for his bath. That means, nagging him to get in the bathroom and get in the bath. Lately, he dawdles for ever before actually getting in the bath. First he probably goes to the toilet. Then he looks in the mirror while he's washing his hands. I usually hear him talking to himself so I'm assuming he's making faces in the mirror and pretending to be some superhero. At this point, I tell him to get in the bath. Eventually, I hear splashes of water and then, "Mom, the water's too cold!" This is because he's using the same bathwater that Asia was in. This is okay, right? I don't want to waste water and it's not like Asia peed in the water. So I tell him to turn on the hot water. This is logical. Why he has to tell me it's too cold and not just turn on the water is beyond me. I think it's like me telling my husband that the trash in the kitchen is full. He knows it's full. That's why he started stacking the trash above the trash can. My statement means, take out the trash now. I just don't say it that way. So I think that's what Zach means when he tells me the water is cold and knows that he can turn on the hot water himself. He wants me to come over and turn on the hot water for him. And often it's because he's completely immersed in the water or again, making faces in the reflection on the faucet.
So back to Asia and playing with dolls. We're having some quiet time before bedtime. She's asking me if I've played dolls with her before. I'm sure I have. I can't remember when, but I'm positive there was one time in her five years on this earth. So I tell Asia that yes, I have played dolls with her.
Asia says, "I don't think you have. Do you know what you play with me?"
I'm dreading the answer.
"Webkinz." She says.
And it is so true! What do I like playing with her? Computer games! Not playing with the actual Webkinz stuffed animals. But computer games. So I felt some guilt. But I still didn't play dolls with her. I watched her play dolls. It was more amusing. If she's happy playing on her own, why interrupt?

So today, I vowed, well not really, I planned for less computer time. We first went to the library. I forgot it was closed. So we went to a restaurant across the street of the library and ate. While waiting for our food, I had Zach write down as many words as he could that ended in op and then finish a book. Asia drew pictures and then we worked on some words too. She can read maybe 20 words. I think that will pick up like lightning in Kindergarten this year.
Then we went to Bruester's for ice cream. Representatives from the animal shelter were actually at the ice cream shop, so the kids played with two dogs there. One was a really cute minitaure pinscher named Zeus who is about 2 1/2 years old. Very cute little guy. Very mellow. He had just been dropped off at the animal shelter the day before. Apparently he wasn't getting along with one of the owner's cats. Poor doggie. We then went to Target. See this is what I do with the kid's on weekends when John's out doing his thing (rafting today). We go out to eat and we go shopping.
Now what are the kids doing? Playing in a mud puddle in our backyard. Again, the best of intentions - I was going to pull out our kiddie pool, except that it had been sitting curled up at the side of our house all winter. So it was all muddy and had bugs on it. By the time I had it out flat and somewhat rinsed off, I was too tired. Not only that, I couldn't find the air pump. So I sprayed the kids with water and then let them loose with the water hose. They decided to make a huge water puddle. Hey, if they're happy, I'm happy.

Chicago

I'm finally back in Pittsburgh, trying to get back on schedule. We were in Chicago last week. Or Chicago parts. First two days in a hotel by O'hare, spent a night at Hans & Grace's in Prospect Heights, another night at John's dad's house in Streamwood, two nights at Tom's house in Irving Park, and a night at Nick & Kathy's in Evanston. So if you're a die-hard Chicagoan, you might say we stayed in suburbs all week and weren't really in Chicago. If you're from out of town, then it's all the same. Metro Chicago, I believe would be the term. I worked the whole time, but I did manage to take time off to have dinner with our friends Avni and Ardita in the South Loop area. Zach and their son, Rron, went to preschool together. It's great for them to be still friends after we moved away. I also took a 1/2 day off to go to our old neighborhood on Taylor St and have lunch at Francesca's with Zach & Asia's old babysitter, Joyce. On Saturday, we also hung out with Marissa. The kids got to help her with some cookie-making as well as jump on her bed. I got my Korean food fix at Nick & Kathy's. I have yet to find a good Korean restaurant in Pittsburgh. I sorta found a good Chinese restaurant in Squirrel Hill. It's just quite a hike to get there because of the traffic on 376 and constructions. Yuck. The kids also had a blast in Irving Park, staying with their cousins - Justin, Christian, Seth, Henna, as well as Christian's girlfriend, Cora. Zach got to sleep in the basement with Seth and probably stayed up late playing video games. And then woke up and played video games. Now how dreamy is that for a 7 year old? Anyway, it was a whirlwind, but fun. Good to see old haunts and old friends. Not enough time to see everyone of course. John has this idea now that he wants to rent a place next summer and stay in Chicago for about 6 weeks. Could be fun. We'll see.

bittersweet

I'm in Austin, TX this weekend. First I was in Harrisburg, packing up my sis's stuff. She transferred her residency to Houston, TX and didn't lose a year! She's transferring right in as chief resident (4th year). How divine is that? Now she'll only be 3 hours away from my dad, versus 23 hours. But now she'll be 20 some hours from me. You win some, you lose some. So anyway, I helped Es pack up her stuff because she was working til 6/30 (on call that weekend) and then had to be in her new apartment by 7/3. Her hours were so crazy. Even when she was "backup" on pager, she still had to go in. One night, she called to say she was done and that we can go out to dinner (when my dad was in town already). I got all dressed up and then just as she's pulling into the garage, she gets paged. Apparently a little 2 year old girl was running around and fell down some stairs or something while holding a toothbrush in her mouth. It wasn't a baby toothbrush either. So the dad cut off part of the toothbrush and the little girl was rushed to the hospital. Es said she had to cut into the little girl's neck to remove the head of the toothbrush. A toothbrush! You wouldn't think that would be very sharp and puncture your throat! So anyway, we couldn't go out to eat since my dad's truck was hitched to this big Uhaul and Es had to drive back to the hospital. What a life! I now understand one of the reasons doctors get paid so much once they're out of residency. They go through pure hell for those 3-10 years of residency.
Es was so lucky in finding a nice apartment online without ever having seen it! No floor plan. Just google maps and hearsay from friends. She really didn't have much choice, also because of having 2 dogs. One of the apartment complexes wouldn't take both dogs. So we packed up her stuff and loaded it into a Ford pick-up truck my dad rented that was towing a 12x6 UHaul trailer. Her stuff almost didn't fit. She had to leave behind her doggie door insert and some patio chairs. I also sold off two of her couches, lawnmower, lamp, and her guest bed. Thank you Craigslist! You sell it cheap enough, it goes! I actually sold the guest bed first. A family was moving from an apartment to a new house and looking for more furniture. The wife actually said she was looking for beds for the kids, but when she saw my posting, she thought it'd be nice to have a newer bed for her and her husband. When she and her husband came to pick up the bed, I asked her if she wanted couches too. I told her I already had an offer of 75 for the two, so if she wanted to beat that price, she could have them. She took them for 100 and also bought a lamp for 5 bucks. The kicker is that Es got the couches and the lamp free from a friend. The lawnmower was also a hand-me-down.
Back to the trip from Harrisburg to Houston. Not bad of a trip at all. My dad drove the pick-up the whole time. Es and I traded off driving her car - loaded down with her guitars, keyboard, miscellaneous stuff, and two dogs. Boy, those dogs were so good on the whole trip. My dog would have been getting antsy. But he's only a year and a half. Cous and Cory are like teenagers already - in dog years. We stayed in hotels on the way - one in Wytheville, VA and the other in Baton Rouge, LA. Thanks to my visa card points - free hotel nights. I forgot about the dogs though and didn't look into hotels that accepted pets. Cous and Cory had to spend those nights in Es' car. Can you believe it? Again, they were so well-behaved!
We arrived in Houston and found Es' apartment complex. Nice gated community. Interesting demographics. Very un-Harrisburg/Hershey and very un-Pittsburgh. Probably very un-Pennsylvania. Surprising enough, the apartment was pretty nice. A one bedroom with a little study connected to it. Nice sized living room, dining room, and kitchen. Nothing compared to owning an actual 3 bedroom house, but for 2 years, it'll be comfy. I hope.
I drove back to Austin with my dad on Saturday. Now I've been just taking it easy. Catching up on the internet (my sis didn't have her internet hooked up yet - we spent hours on the phone on the car trip to Houston yelling at AT&T because they couldn't hook up her internet until 7 business days later - not counting 7/4 and the weekends - AT&T entertainment said they could hook up the cable in 3 days, AT&T internet needed 7 days just to process the account information! Get it together AT&T!), enjoying Texas weather and getting some sun. The sad part is that I keep seeing little things here and there that remind me of my mom. I was cooking dinner and started getting teary-eyed because I thought, my mom should be standing here cooking. This is her kitchen, not mine. Earlier, I had been cleaning out one of the refrigerators because my dad turned it off to clean it and never got to it before he left for PA. So I was throwing stuff away and came upon my mom's stash of cake frosting and the little frosting flowers she was practicing making. They were so cute - little pink flowers and hearts. I hated throwing them away. I could picture Mom making them. Her hobby - cake decorating. She was so proud of her cakes. I still couldn't bear to throw it all away. How long does purple frosting last? Hopefully forever. I drove by Walgreens on the way to my dad's house and got teary-eyed, just remembering when I would take my mom to there or CVS to pick up her arthritis prescriptions.
My dad and I stopped by her grave today after the meeting so we could check on it. The gravestone must have just been installed. It's very nice. It says, "Precious in the sight of the Lord." I'm hoping that in a few weeks, the grass will have been planted and the grave area cleaned up. Then Es is supposed to help put some flowers in. Okay, now I'm getting weepy again so I'll type more some other time.