Every now and then, your kids just say something that, while it's so ordinary to an adult, is really profound coming from a child's mouth. Asia and I were talking about bad guys while we were in the car on our way to her Girl Scout's Daisy meeting. It was later at night and maybe because of the darkness, she started asking if bad guys were real. She said she started thinking about them after that one day in the store when she went to the boys' room to change. It took me a few minutes to recall this event, then I realized she was talking about a trip to Kohl's over a year ago when Asia and I had a little argument about trying on some leotards for dance. She wanted to try on one that was too small for her and more expensive then the one I wanted her to try on. So after I told her that she could not try it on and then I went to look through the clearance racks for more clothes for her, she disappeared. I figured she was upset and was sulking over by the toys or something. I walked around a bit and couldn't find her. That's when I started to panic. What seemed like an hour was probably only about 10 minutes, but 10 minutes missing is still frightening. Frightening at least for a paranoid mom. Eventually I found her coming out of the dressing room in the boys area! She decided she was going to try on that leotard all by herself. Earlier in the shopping trip, we had gone into the girls' dressing room to try on some clothes, so she knew that those rooms were used for that purpose. At least, she didn't strip down in the middle of the store to try the leotard on. So on one hand, I was proud of her independence. She had walked all the way to a dressing room area, took off her clothes and put on the leotard, then came back to me with almost all of her clothes in her arms and wearing the leotard. I say almost all of her clothes because she lost her socks at some point. We retraced her steps and checked the dressing room and they weren't there. But anyway, I scolded her that day telling her that she should not walk away like that without telling me because sometimes bad guys like to take little girls away from their mothers. I told her that would make me really sad if someone stole her from me. I guess that made a lasting impression on her because she cried on the way home from Kohl's because she didn't want a bad guy to take her away. And of course, she couldn't sleep that night either. Ugh. It's so hard to know to what degree to tell a child that bad things can happen.
Okay, back to the drive to Daisy's and the present. So my dear daughter asked me if bad guys were really real. I debated this in my head on how to present the subject. I didn't want to lie and say that there is no evil in this world, nor did I want her to be paranoid about every little thing. So I told her that there bad people out there but they usually are in bad areas, not where we live, and come out at night when most people are sleeping. Sure I could have told her that bad people can be anyone and anywhere, but then I'd have a poor little girl who would probably never leave her house or my side again. Anyway, so all this leads up to the clever statement Asia made. She said:
"So bad guys are nocturnal?"
How funny is that! I had to laugh.
"They come out when people are sleeping, Mom. So they're nocturnal."
My soon-to-be 6 year old said that!
Yes, Asia, bad guys are nocturnal. Let's keep it as simple as that.
